Conviction

It has been a rough week. I am sure if you have been reading my blog- you may understand a bit of what I mean.
I think on the outside- I have managed to smile and pretend my way through the week- but yesterday on the phone I realized just how horrible I had been.
At the risk of sounding whining, I will give you some lowlights of the past week.
1. Our school scored very low on the education department review. Thats bad. Really, really bad.
2. My classes were just okay this week. I am struggling and am not really sure what I am struggling with- making it hard to explain and ask for help.
3. My computer died and I have no idea the cost it will take to fix it.I simply do not have the funds to fix my computer (even though it is in the shop) and pay for a car and pay for an apartment when I get home. Even with saving the majority of my pay from now until August. Money will be extremely tight.
4. I feel very alone. No computer means no talking to friends on skype. Friends here try- but it is so hard to develop deep friendships with people who have children and husbands and home lives that are much busier than mine.

With all that said- I made it to International Fellowship this week. My boss was speaking and honestly, sometimes I don't like it when she does because she tends to fall more on the liberal side of things and I don't always agree. I will admit though a lot of my thoughts have changed in that I now understand what I should be liberal with (my time, my limited finances and my Savior's love), even if I do not always practice it. She spoke about the dinner where the Savior's feet were anointed by Mary. She talked of how Judas complained and how Mary had learned that it was about worship- more than money or status. I was convicted more than once- earlier that we had sung about how nothing compares to the promise that we have in Him. I have sung that song a THOUSAND times and maybe more. And yet today, I thought about the words- how nothing can compare to the Promise. Not even the relationship or the joy that we have been given but the promise in and of itself. The promise that He would meet every need and even if He choose to withhold blessings- He had promised His eternal life. And nothing can compare to that. Not a great review, a working computer, a friend to ease the loneliness. Nothing compares. Easter is fast approaching and I am reminded of why I gave up facebook. I am looking forward to celebrating with my International group and taking time to think abut the cross. The way that was made. The promise that no matter how He answers my prayers- He loves me and willingly laid down His own life- so that I could live-with or without a computer. And the promise of unconditional love and life? Well, nothing compares to that.

7 Quick Takes #?

My weeks are starting to FLY! I can not believe how busy I am and how much I am really looking forward to next Monday when we get a day off of school.

1. It's almost APRIL! Seriously, my mind has been stuck at new years and already we are half way down with this term. In some respects I feel very very far behind. I am ready though to get into April. Sad to say- but I am over the month of March and am antsy for this month to end already!

2. April 11th- I am going to be back on facebook. It's strange though- I thought I would miss it more than I have. It will be wierd to get back on and I am hoping that even though I will be on it, I will continue to use my time wisely.

3. May already holds the promise of being a great month! My birthday, getting to go to HK- albeit for my visa again but still, my New Zealand friend Kristen who I met 4 years ago is coming at the end of May. Kristen is one of my favorite people and I am really looking foward to her coming and staying with Daisy and I.

4. My Monday night crew is AMAZING. I love them. This week the food was just okay- btu the conversation and the games were great. I am hoping that next year when Cara and Joel decide to do another home class that most of my group will head over to their house and to learn more specifically about Jesus.

5. I made Leslie's chicken enchiladas last night. It was my first night in a LONG time that I have been able to sit at home and not have to worry about babysitting or meetings. I went to bed super early and then woke up this morning feeling rested and ready for my Saturday.

6. My computer is being fixed. I am nervous about how much it will be to fix it and what the problem is. Thankfully I did not have to go to Macau or Hong Kong. I took it to a store here in town and they were able to get it fixed! I added something Friday to my busy schedule that I will be needing my computer for. Hopefully I will get it back soon.

7. Thursday was a bad day. We had the education department come to review out school and unfortunately they were not playing fair. They sent a neighboring principal to review us and she marked us VERY low. All of the teachers and my employer were HIGHLY upset.The good news is that Friday came anyway and the world did not stop. I am hoping and praying the teachers and staff have a restful weekend and do not give up because of this. Although we were marked low, the kids there need and deserve the best possible care.

Okay- I think thats all. Hope you have a great weekend!

525600 Minutes

525600 minutes. In a year. Thats right. The broadway musical RENT taught me that.

I have about 4 amd half months left in China.

My mind is thinking about housing in the fall, how to pay for classes, and what to do about a vehicle when I get back. The physical necessities. My mind is also thinking about the emotional and spirtual needs of getting back into a culture that has changes- into a life that is not how I left it.

Yet- today I was reminded that I only have about 198765 minutes left in China and those are slipping away- wasted by me focusing on other things.

198765 minutes.

In the words of RENT- how do you measure a year in the life?
It's my precious little student Charlie's and my precious friend Yuki's birthdays. Today for atleast some of those minutes- I plan to celebrate them.

The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

I remember growing up whenever Mr. Turner would come and talk to us in chapel, he and Mrs. Turner would read us this story. I don't remember the entire thing but the gist was that this little boy had a very very bad day.

I wanted to move to Australia yesterday.

My computer decided to have issues, my allegries decided to flare, the taxi driver over charged me, Daisy's computer did not want to play the last 10 minutes of our movie and gosh darnit my smoked chicken did not turn out the way it should have.

Plus I had to wake up this morning.

I need to move to Australia. Apparently there are no bad days there. :)

GST I think I am on like 6 of 365

1. The warm sunshine making me want to play outside all day with my students.
2. Having my oldest class sing the song we have been learning to my employer and watching her reaction.
3. Learning a new breakfest recipe from my friend Joanna's blog http://eslteachertravels.blogspot.com/ and hoping I can try it soon.
4. Getting a e-mail from my best friend and getting more and more excited to hopefully go and see her when I get back to the states!
5. Sleeping in for 15 minutes this morning. It was needed and great!

#4

Alright so it's Tuesday not Friday but whatever. It's the first day in a week that I have had time to sit down and write anything. 

So here are my seven quick takes:

1. This week has been CRAZY! Monday night I had dinner with some newfound friends from the Pharmacy school. I got to share a little bit. Please, please keep praying for them. They have many questions and I want to answer as honestly as I can. They will be coming over to my house for dinner this Monday night.

2. Wednesday. My bosses birthday. So in honor of that, I bought a small oven. I LOVE it. I wish I would have invested in one sooner. I made her a cake with cookies on the top and little pieces of melted dove bar inside. Needless to say it was AMAZING. The night before my roommate and I had practice making a cake- she was so excited to use the measuring cups I had found in Macau. I am hoping to give the oven to her when I leave.

3. Thursday night. Oh Thursdays. I love Thursdays. My friend, Cara, was spending time with her friends from the US so my roommate and I hosted Thursday night at our house. It was great! I had a blast playing games, cooking dinner and talking with these incredible ladies who want to learn. 

4. Friday. I taught my students a fun song from my childhood- a Mr. Turner song- and it was so much fun to hear them laugh and sing along. Then I got to play mommy to three incredible kids while their parents were out of town. Thankfully, I did not have to take care of them overnight but for the 6 hours I did have them- it was lots of fun hearing their conversations and watching movies and playing legos with them.

5. Sunday. I watched a video with my International fellowship about a man who was born without arms and legs. It was a moving testimony followed by a great conversation and great food!

6.  The following Monday. I hosted my first English corner at my apartment. The broccoli was too salty and I started cooking too early- but the apple pie was incredible! We played UNO for a couple hours and the college students all had a lot of fun. I was tired afterwards, but it was worthwhile to develop new friendships with great people. I am having them over again next Monday. Hopefully the dinner will be better :)

7. Tuesday. I am celebrating today but updating my blog, baking a cake and waiting for my roommate so we can make cheesecake and watch Friends. Yay for rest! Tomorrow starts the craziness all over again.  

#3

1. I bought my plane ticket. One way westward. I will be home Thursday, August 13th, at around 10am. I almost cried though when I saw the price. I know hard times are going on worldwide- but honestly I am struggling not to revert to my old self and worry about finances. Trusting sounds so simple, cliche and easy. In reality, it hard to let go of things and remember that I can be confident He has the world completely under control.

2. March. I love March. Spring time. I have been really happy about the weather here and have mentioned it a few times in recent updates. Then China had to go and let me down. It has been raining and cold (okay like 60's) for the past 3 days!! AHHHHHHHHH! I was so upset. I realized that my mood generally is effected by the weather. It has been hard staying awake through the day without wanting to watch TV or a movie- which would put me to sleep and defeat the no nap policy that I have recently implemented in my life. I find I sleep better at nights without a nap.

3. No more mice! The men came and did whatever people do in order to rid the world of rats, mice and other disgusting disease carriers. Cats are still hanging around but I am hoping that by the time I leave they will have moved on to pester someone else.

4. Thursdays. I love Thursdays! It is a tie for my favorite day of the week with Wednesdays. Followed by Sundays and Tuesdays. Thursdays I go over to my American families home for dinner and an English corner hosted in their house. This past Thursday we did a craft activity and if you know me well you know I don't do creative craft making at all because I am not very good. Shockingly I made a very pretty card that I was quite proud of. This Thursday we are not having a get together and I am sad.

5. When Daisy, my roommate and I, started talking about what to do on Thursday we decided to have the group come over to our place. Now our apartment is not the cleanest in the world mostly because Daisy and I are really busy or really tired. So this weekend and Monday and Tuesday our goal is to clean the entire apartment. It's a bit scary...

6. In addition to hosting Thursday night, we will also be cooking dinner. No joke. I don't cook. That's why Wednesdays and Thursdays are great. Because I don't have to figure out how to feed myself. Daisy doesn't cook- unless you count hard boiling eggs. After talking about it for about an hour we came up with a menu. Daisy will teach me how to make Chinese dumplings and I will be making vegetables, cookies and mac and cheese. I feel like a bit like Holly Homemaker and have decided if this is what I want to do with the rest of my life (meaning that I am considering an interesting graduate program and have just about settled on it) sharing, inviting and learning, then I better start practicing now.  It is a blessing to have them because although they are not what I pictured when I asked for friendships, they are very special and play important roles in my life.

7. April 2nd promises to be a good day. It's a Thursday so of course it will be a good day- but I was invited to join with my New Zealand family and my Thursday night group to go see a London Drama Company perform Oliver Twist. I know the story from Wishbone on PBS but can honestly say I have never read the book. It's on my to buy list when I go to Macau on Tuesday afternoon in order to UPS some things to my parents.

BRRRRR

Just when I thought spring had arrived and I could put away rainy day/cold weather clothing.... China has to go and change it's mind. You would think I would be use to this country's indecisiveness. I'm not. 

It's yucky outside and damp in my classroom. I am not a fan. 

My GST today may be done with a twinge of bitterness as my laundry has yet to dry. Grrr.

1. Eating friend rice for lunch. One less meal I have to figure out.

2. Missing one class today because they went on a field trip.

3. Discussing my love of chocolate with my employer and finding out she made chocolate cupcakes that would be shared when I went over for Wednesday night meeting.

4. Wednesday nights and being able to share and to learn. I will really miss them when I leave.

5. Watching "Horton Hears a Who" with Mahlia and Liam and laughing through it. 

A bonus- the weather is suppose to be sunny and 70 tomorrow on Thursday. I believe I will celebrate if and when that is true.

Autumn

Autumn, my favorite 2 and half year old, and I were playing the English room on Sunday after church. The conversation as we were getting ready to leave went like this:

Me: Autumn can I come play at your house?

Autumn: No.

Me: Well.... Why not?

Autumn: Because I don't like your shirt.

I laughed.... pretty hard. 

Tuesday GST:

1. Watching my oldest class have a BLAST today in English and knowing that they were learning.

2. Funny text messages that make me smile. Even though the messages are suppose to be serious. 

3.  Watching Madea goes to Jail and laughing a lot throughout the movie. Truthfully the endings in Madea always seem unrealistic for a "realistic" movie- I prefer the plays. 

4. Not having a lot to do and finding that I should clean my room.

5. Cleaning my room didn't take a long time. :)

GST

Leslie had a better explaination for GST than I could come up with. Here it is:

Grace in Small Things "exists because we are choosing not to allow the noisiness of life to rob us of the time and energy to be mindful of ourselves and those we love and to recognize the grace that exists in small things....it is a challenge for every day, because there's no time like the present, tomorrow, never comes, and some other cliche about seizing the day.  Oh right: carpe diem" (http://graceinsmallthings.ning.com/).  The idea is to find five things everyday where we can see God's grace and be thankful for those 5 things. 

Here are mine for the weekend. Be advised that I will probably not do this every day as I should. 3/4 of 365.

1. Honest conversations with my friend Cara about my future and knowing she not only listening but semi-caring about  me rambling on about my life.

2. Inviting myself over to Cara and Joel's on Sunday and still having a great afternoon.

3. Sunday morning worship. I always wonder if our churches in the US were to lose everything how real would we be- Sunday mornings prove that we can worship without things that make usually make life more comfortable.

4. Making Hamburger Helper and having leftovers for at least 2 days.

5. Sleeping in later that I probably should have on Saturday. Needed and incredible.

6.  Reading the rest of my book on Sunday evening. Kind of weird Paulo Coelho.

7. Talking to Leslie and Annie in the same day.

8. Finding plane tickets to NJ to see my best friend when I get back to the states in August.

9. Finishing 2 pages of scholarship stuff and only having 1 more left!

10. Knowing all my lesson plans are done for the week so I could relax in the weekend.